The weekend update, 10 March, 2014


The sweater doesn’t work on you mate.

This is the first edition of what I hope will be a weekly feature here on the blog, the weekend update. I can’t promise I’ll cover every league out there, or indeed that I will cover the league action you love, but I will drop something in here every week. That is the goal, anyway…

There was plenty of football to watch this weekend, with the FA Cup dishing up plenty of entertainment in the form of Man City’s ignominious exit from the competition, along with the Arse dishing out some punishment to a hapless Everton side who saw the ball about as much as Ray Charles saw his audience in his playing days. Here’s hoping Wigan can do to the Gunners what they did to my beloved Toffees last year. Of course Roberto Martinez was in charge of the Latics then, and was unable to reproduce the cupset we needed to carry on in the competition. Alas… Sheffield United brought some much needed joy to Bramall Lane in the form of a deserved victory of Charlton Athletic, and the Tigers of the City of Hull -who are no longer Hull City but Hull Tigers (due to club chairman Assem Allam’s deep understanding of his team’s supporters) put a poor Sunderland to the sword. This sets up an interesting semi between the Blades and the Tigers of the Hull of City or City of Hull… large striped predatory felines? I don’t know… think it should just be Hull City like it’s been for, you know, the last one hundred years.

So we will see no Man Citeh in the semis of this venerable competition, the quad is most definitely off, but at least they can sing Blue Moon to the glittering League Cup in their trophy cabinet. Frankly, I leaves me with a deep sense of satisfaction when the very very very rich clubs shit the bed. Just saying…

In the Premier League, Man U managed to pull their finger out and win one on the road against West Brom. Poor Pepe Mel is looking only slightly less uncomfortable than David Moyes in the hot seat, where he has yet to see his team take full points in the seven games he’s been in charge… Cardiff went out and roll over the meek and submissive Fulham, who appear to be winning the race for this season’s edition of First to the Drop. Southampton pulled off a decent victory at the much-harder-to-beat-under-Tony-Pulis Crystal Palace. Here’s hoping Jay Rodriguez will be wearing Everton Blue next season… Chelsea handed Tottenham their collective asses in a 4 to nil drubbing that could have been quite a bit more and included perhaps the most brilliant goal celebration in the history of the game from the ancient Samuel Eto’o. Stoke and Norwich battled out to a draw which seems about right for that pair.

Real Madrid are liable to win this season’s La Liga, and were keen to show why as they brushed Levante aside. Barcelona are having a season to forget an slipped to defeat at the hands of Valladolid. Atletí are still in the mix though, and carried on their winning ways against Celta Vigo. But this season’s story is increasingly shaping up to be the resurgence of Real Madrid, who are finding ways to make the obscenely overpriced Gareth Bale work with Cristiano Ronaldo. Oh that the Blau Grana could do the same with Messi and Neymar.

I’d talk about the Bundesliga but yawn… except that Bayern Munich supremo Uli Hoeness admits to tax fraud of titanic (or Bismarkian?) proportions.  I’m curious to see wht kind of knock-on effect this will have at the Bavarian giants… I’d comment on Italian football, but I think Bill Wilson’s article on does a better job than I could.

And that, my friends, is all I have time for this week. Hope to give a little updatey thing tomorrow after the wrap up of some Champions League footie. Happy viewing friends and we’ll see you back here soon.